Meet Barb

“The problem is all of the party, party, drink, drink, and drugs. The only thing he is missing is the sex and violence,” I was saying to Barb.

“Those would be at my party,” my girl announces.

“Sex and violence sounds like a party to me,” Barb says.

“My party would also have cake,” my girl says.

This conversation, by the way, was on our way to meet with my advisor.  My advisor and I meet twice a month and my advisor has asked about Barb before.   People always want to meet Barb after they get to know me and the meeting usually goes something like this:

“You’re Barb and you are not (insert one of the following) insane, scarred that we can see, laughing like a maniac, drooling, inflatable, or imaginary?”

Okay that might be a slight exaggeration, but people really do want to meet her.  So when Barb sat down in the office with me, the next thing we know there are other people from the office walking by looking in the office, sticking their head in the doorway, and in one case carrying on a conversation with Barb.  The conversation started with the usual and ended on Legos.  Legos really are the glue that bind the world together.

The fascination that people have with someone who could be married to me, get me, like, even love me is always interesting to me and fascinating to watch.  I know that I can be a pain in the ass, and that is being charitable.  Thus the concept that there is someone out there who can keep up with me must be intriguing to other people who only know me.  Given that I try to keep work, and school separate from home most people do not get to meet Barb.  But, they get to hear about her from me, as I talk about her a lot.  She is my:

Best Friend

Lover

Editor

Brainstormer

Geek

Translator

Filter

Litmus Test

And so many other things to me.  Barb is used to this treatment from others as this has been the case for almost as long we have been together.  People want to know how she does it, ask her some question about me, to find out how I tick, just ask why, and many other things.  Then once they get their answers, they start talking to her about her, but given how much I talk about her many people comment that the reason why they ask her about me first is because they feel that they know her already.

I don’t know what I would do without her at my side, but I do know that the world would have no clue at all with what to do with me without her.

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