Star Wars Imperial Assault Mouse Hunt

The Empire rules the galaxy. The galaxy. The Empire is never shy of ships and troops to throw at a problem. If these statements are true, why then am I, the Imperial player, in Star Wars Imperial Assault always running shy of troops to throw at this Rebel problem of mine. I feel a lot like Nathan Lane in Mouse Hunt. No matter what I do, no matter how smart or insane the plan, the mouse (rebels) always seem to be one step ahead of me and laughing as my plans blow up in my face.

Seriously, three rebels against an entire base of Imperials and the best I can manage is to not lose all of my stormtroopers in one turn or have an officer give a command that doesn’t result in that trooper getting eliminated faster. Fine, I admit I forgot to pack the assault armor this last game, but at one point I had six stormtroopers, two trandoshans, and an officer against two trapped rebels. With that kind of firepower when the smoke cleared Darth Vader should have been pinning a medal on my chest. Instead, I kept checking my throat.

Dumb luck? Faulty dice, although the dice seemed to work just fine for the rebels. A love for the story where the plucky rebels overcome tremendous odds to win in the end. I have no idea. I only know what I saw. What I saw was three rebels enter the base to rescue a spy. One rebel went AWOL, hiding in a corner for several turns. That is my story. The rebel’s story is that she was trying to open a door. Whatever. While she was missing, the other two bore the brunt of the Empire.

The brunt being a ton of stormtroopers, probe droids, officers, and the occasional trandoshan. Due to the rebel lack of planning and dumb luck, I had one deployment zone which bottled all of my troops together. What should have been a tidal wave of white armor and blasters turned into a charnel house of dead troopers trying not to trip over the bodies in front of them with an officer in the rear screaming, “not in the face.”

It was not triumphant. It was silly, no a farce. Would assault armor made a difference? Hell yes, two extra health would have meant that instead of stormtroopers popping like balloons that they would have fought like…well, like well trained soldiers. Maybe stood a chance against that Jedi. Seriously, didn’t Order 66 or 73 or whatever Order wipe them out? What kind of luck is it that finds a Jedi running around my base? Dumb luck I tell you.

I would like to say that with all of the resources at my disposal we stopped the spy from escaping. After all he was wounded before the escape. Nope. He limped out with a smile on his face. Might as well had a transport waiting for him in handicapped parking. Next time the rebels show up at a base of mine, I am nuking the site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.

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