There’s Got To Be a Plunger Somewhere

PK recently Chopped, sat brushing his ankle hair. Each hair got two strokes following the lay of the hair. Do not stroke the wrong way.

“You made me walk long distances and people can learn from mine,” NB said in defense of her Chopped piece.

“You wrote a recipe that doesn’t make anything, thus leaving you hungry, and your hair is flat,” The Squiggle Formerly Known as Ben Mark retorted.

And the gloves were off.

Ben Mark had warned us over lunch that his doctor did not want him engaging in sports because of his competitive streak. This is fine and dandy when talking about going bowling. Who doesn’t want to see someone throw a bowling ball in anger? I know I do, but Chopped? The next time someone says to me, “my doctors says I am competitive to the point of homicide,” I will listen and counsel others to listen. Did murder occur? No, but there was talk that if the class was a prison drama NB would not be taking a shower alone anytime soon nor working out in the weight yard. She was cool with that, not the murder part, the working out part as she does not like walking long distances. We laughed a lot.

How did I do in today’s Chopped challenge? I shit the bucket. Long story short, I was that contestant with a vision in their head and one thing goes wrong near the end and instead of rallying, they take everything they made up to that point, pile it on the plate, and claim they made a deconstructed whatever. I did not claim anything other than I shit the bucket, bad. Thus, I find myself in an unfamiliar place, the loser bracket. But wait, the loser bracket consists of ME and the other students who have already fucked off. Shit, two of them didn’t bother showing up to class and another sat there. So I guess I will be the winner of the losers bracket.

PK and NBWhen we weren’t walking long distances or Chopping we were talking. We talked about

  • the unnecessary nature of prequels
  • how most sequels are unnecessary
  • the importance of being the most self-important person in the room
  • Instagram
  • partying-in particular how once you hit a certain age partying loses its luster
  • Plans for bowling and other group, but non-competitive activities
  • Squirels and squirrels with turbo (I can’t take credit for that, the other table was odd)

I really feel these last two weeks should be spent forming a writer’s group that meets to shoot the shit, inspire each other to write more and better, and eat lunches in public places where our style of dress and conversation cause people to stare to the point of rudeness. Like an Algonquin Round Table only better.

I have not been inspired by other people to write as much as I have by this group of individuals. If you are reading this and I hope you are, thank you.







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