Smell My Marker and Other Toy Stories

“I hope this one doesn’t smell like shit,” our girl announces right before she jams a marker near her nostril and takes a deep inhale.

Based on her facial expression it did smell like shit.

“Here,” she says attempting to jam the marker up my right nostril, “smell this.”

“What the hell are you doing?”

“Smelling my Mr. Stench markers.”

“Mr. Stench?”

“Yeah these smelly markers I got at Toy’s R Us.”

“Oh, Mr. Sketch. But based on the stench of that last marker…”

“Nacho cheese,” she interrupts.

“Nacho cheese? Yeah, Mr. Stench is right.”

Welcome to part of my day. πŸ™‚

I had an urge to go to Toy’s R Us. Not the kids, they wanted to stay home and play. What the hell is that about? Why stay at home and play when you can go to a store and play. Plus, if you make a mess playing at the store, I won’t yell at you to pick it up. I will laugh a lot while walking away professing to anyone who is in listening range, “I don’t know who that kid is, but their parents need to get him or her under control.”

Barb found me a Spongebob Squarepants backpack, that would fit if I was several feet shorter. As it is, the backpack sits high on my back. High enough that my butt looks great wearing it. Our girl found Mr. Stench. Our boy a bucket of pirates, which leads to…

“dad, I need to go out the car. I think I left a cannon in the car.”

“Go get the keys and no driving off.”

“I promise, no driving off.”


“I think that is our car,” I say to Barb.

As she stands up, the boys bursts into the house, “It won’t stop. I didn’t even get to check the car.”

Barb instructs him on how NOT to set off the alarm and he sets off.


“I think he figured it out.”

Lego MiniBarb found the latest Lego Mini-figure releases. She loves these things. I think it has to do with her/our obsession with opening packages and getting fun things out of them. It started with Magic the Gathering and has continued without fail ever since.

Not bad for an urge to go to the toy store. πŸ™‚


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