“Even the world’s greatest actor cannot fake an erection.”
I have the beginnings of a chubby guaranteed to be very engorged, veiny, and girthy; if you remember girth is where it is at. Don’t believe me, read this post for proof and ask anyone who has to deal with the age old question length or girth because it is not the motion of the ocean, that shit gets you sea sick and who wants barf on them and if that is you, DO NOT raise your hand in this room, it is all about girth and if the van is a rocking then…
so back to my impending chubby, school starts tomorrow. While, I like every parent, I should say most every-there seem to be plenty of “parents” who do not like their kids-a preponderance of them seem to live in Texas or visit Chucky Cheeses, not clue why but if the news is to be believed that is where they are found. Now goats in a ditch, that is Ohio along with Meth labs, not that this part of Michigan isn’t attempting to take over that title…seriously people get a fucking hobby other than attempting to live out your Breaking Bad memories-a show that I could not get past the third episode of…but hey I like coffee, love my kids I WANT THEM OUT OF THE HOUSE.
I cannot even begin to tell you all of the things my impending chubby and I will do once the door closes, the car is out of the drive way, and the pants cum off, but trust me it will be epic and messy on a scale that only Salvador Dali or someone equally riding that line of madness and genius can imagine and put into some form of media for people to walk by shield their eyes and scream to the heavens, “Why GOD! Why?!”
And why am I telling you this? Because my video camera is broke, YouTube banned me, and snap chat is for losers. Yes losers. You want to take a pic of your genitals and throw them around the interwebs then own that shit…a few seconds indeed, if I am going to waste my precious time looking your genitals you had better be very close to me or have genitals that people routinely and without sarcasm refer to as “from the gods!” Mostly I am mentioning my impending chubby because with chubby cums happiness, in that I get some me time.
No! Not like that. I’m not talking about five minutes of fun, but something longer. I can do the thing you are thinking about (and get out of my gutter) just about any time I want, but true me time where no one is asking, whining, whinging, bitching, or any other ing me is so rare to border on mythical like a unicorn, which is both a horse with a horn and that one person who joins a couple for sex and really want to play with both of them. Yes, me time is that kind of rare.
I need me time or I will get…
Did that image help you understand why I need my me time and I need my me time really really really (no really count this time, I swear) BAD! The children have eroded the shores of my sanity bare and I want to walk on the beach for a bit, I know I hate long walks on the beach, but this time the beach is in my head and my shores are hardly sandy.
“If you are losing your leisure, look out! — It may be you are losing your soul.”